And so I entered a self-hating phase where I scoffed at and rejected the talents of women who reminded me of myself, wrapping the most girlish parts of me in shame and tucking them away. Too many boys I knew showed disdain at worst and boredom at best whenever I tried to share my love for popular, radio-dominating artists like Swift or Spears. By then, years of trying to be a "cool girl" had distorted my music tastes. That means she penned the song right after we had both left our high school years behind. "Dear John" was written by Swift sometime in late 2009 or early 2010, according to Swift's interviews about her "Speak Now" album. Kevin Mazur/WireImage for Clear Channel Radio New York John Mayer and Taylor Swift performed together at Z100's Jingle Ball in 2009. "'Dear John' sounds exactly like a John Mayer song," I realized. My mouth fell open when the opening thwangs of a guitar transported me to a time when my own 19-year-old self listened to Mayer's melancholic music on repeat. I quickly fell in love with her newest masterful songwriting, pushing me to reconsider her other albums I'd glossed over.Ī few days later, I rediscovered "Dear John," the 2010 break-up ballad from Swift's third studio album "Speak Now." Over revealing lyrics and a damning chorus, Swift recalls her toxic relationship with the megastar John Mayer, who collaborated with and dated the 19-year-old when he was 32.Īrmed with my new affinity for Swift's literary stylings and fired up from recent reckonings of society's treatment of Britney Spears and other famous young women of the aughts, I pressed play. Noticing my growing affection for retro tech, my husband gifted me a record player along with a vinyl record of "Evermore." I was by no means a Swiftie, but we both understood the financial and cultural value of her pandemic albums on vinyl. I also found VHS tape footage of my freshman year dance performance to John Mayer's 2003 "Clarity" (viewed by way of a trusty HDMI cable). As a pandemic-induced storm of depression and anxiety raged inside me, I desperately clung to musical nostalgia.Īmong the artifacts I'd dug up was a burned CD from 2006, when Taylor Swift's angsty "I'd Lie" precisely captured my sweetheart years of high school. The winter of 2021 saw me entering a full-blown spiral. "Still Not Over It" is an essay series unpacking pivotal pop culture moments of the 2010s that rarely, if ever, got the deep dive treatment they deserved. WHILE YOU READ: Here's a playlist of John Mayer and Taylor Swift songs. Renfro reveals the song inspired her to reconsider her younger self's rejection of female pop stars. Jeff Kravitz/Getty Tim Mosenfelder/Getty Kevin Mazur/Getty Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Marianne Ayala/InsiderĪ teenage Swift wrote openly about her relationship with John Mayer in the 2010 song, "Dear John." Taylor Swift and John Mayer's brief 2009 relationship is still making waves today.
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